Friday, 3 April 2015

Goodbye For Now

Hi everyone,

So you may have noticed these last couple of months that I haven't been posting as regularly as usual here on the blog. This has been for a number of reasons: I've been grieving for Dylan, battling a burst of increased depression and anxiety and lately, in truth, I've felt burnt out with blogging.

Since starting this blog almost 5 years ago now I've had the odd week or two away for holiday's and things but I've never had a really long break. It's gotten to the point this past month where I really haven't been enjoying blogging and have approached it with a sense of dread and when I don't post I end up feeling really guilty. It's bizarre because I'm still buzzing with ideas for the blog and am enjoying reading so I'm not really sure where this has come from other than my increased depression which can make you lose interest in hobbies. It came to the point the other week where I was really considering saying goodbye to this blog for good.

I've been thinking about this long and hard and have come to the conclusion that I shouldn't make any hasty decisions whilst feeling this way but at the same time I really, really need a break and so I'm going to be taking a complete break from blogging in April and possibly May too depending on how I feel.

April is an ideal time for me to take a break. We're getting a new puppy on Sunday and I want to give her my undivided attention and start getting her trained. I'm also (hopefully) going to be starting private counselling - a big step for me. Although I've had different therapy before I've always put off counselling. I have a lot of trauma in my past that I feel like I'm ready to confront now in order to move on. I've been told by a lot of mental health professionals that this will open up a can of worms and I'm going to feel worse before I feel better and so to have some space to do that without beating myself up because I don't feel like blogging will be ideal.

My hope is that after a month or two away focusing on other aspects of my life I'll feel ready to return and will have that old passion to talk about books returned to me. I've got so many fun ideas for blog posts jotted down and that love for blogging is still there, there are just other things I need to focus on right now guilt free.

In the meantime I'll still be around on Twitter, Goodreads and Instagram - especially Instagram - I have a new account just for my puppy Megan you can follow her here if you like.

I hope you understand and stick with me until I'm back on my feet.

Keep happy and keep reading until next time.

Jess x
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